FRIGHT FEST

So today started out like most Sundays, albeit I was a little more hungover than usual because there was a big hoo-ha over in Oregon Hill that left me worse for the wear. Anyway, we woke up, lazed around and decided we wanted to go out in the crisp air for some food at Joe's Inn because we may be too lazy to cook but not too lazy to walk to get some good ass potatoes. Then I get a call from Megan telling me that she somehow has two free tickets to Kings Dominion that have to be used today and is headed there with Justin right now. The weather was looking pretty icky but we decided to brave it and went out there to meet them after we ate. It was just bizarre to spontaneously leave for Kings Dominion having no plan whatsoever and no expectations, but it ended up being a really fun day. There were no lines, it wasn't a hundred and ten degrees outside, we rode all the good roller coasters over and over, but what I wasn't prepared for was the FRIGHT. Or, as they call it now, "Halloween Haunt" or some stupid shit, I guess it changes every year. We read the map of all the 'scary' attractions they have and decide to go into this totally un-ironically haunted "slaughterhouse" where the terror is that they're really EATING PEOPLE. I mean normally it's animals that they are slaughtering for food but I guess that's a-ok. Regardless! I was not prepared for how fucking terrified I was of this attraction. We walk in and there's a corridor with all this fake hanging meat and then all of a sudden people dressed like deranged butchers with horrifying monster masks start jumping out at us as we walk through the winding halls, and it FREAKED ME OUT SO BAD. I was on the verge of tears by the time we got out of there because they sensed my fear and honed in on me while I clutched Dan's jacket like a 5 year old. The element of suspense, the fact that they're all wielding cleavers, I don't know what it was that turned me from a rational adult who knows that these are humorously nonthreatening amusement park workers wearing masks to someone who truly believed that she was about to be cut up and served to a bunch of pigs (because wouldn't THAT be ironic)! After we got out of there I refused to participate in any further spooky activities, including Club Blood (vampires) and ASYLUM (duh). But even if you didn't want to partake in the sectioned off scare-zones, there were still gobs of scary actors dressed up like demented clowns or undead pilgrims milling around who SMELLED the fact that they could get a high-pitched squeal out of me. When did I become such a baby?! This has really put me on high alert because if I didn't know this about myself what else could there be lurking in my subconscious just waiting to ooze out at the most inopportune moment? What if I'm terrified of a certain breed of dog or completely enamored by sting rays? WHO KNOWS ANYMORE?!?

Oh well, here I am on the merry-go-round :)